1. Find an activity that your teen enjoys that you can do as a family,
regardless of the age of the siblings or other family members. For our
family, its karaoke. Bianca, age 17 sings and all the way down to Emma,
age 2, we all grab the mic and show our "stuff", thus creating
silly memories for all!
2. Loosen and tighten reigns as your Teen's behavior warrants it.
Sometimes he will want to be 25 years old, and other times you will SWEAR
he is 5 years old. If he is acting in an immature fashion, set firmer
guidelines and rules. Without knowing it, he is begging you for it. As his
behavior improves, loosen the reigns. Base your grip on his behavior, not
on the calendar or his peers.
3. Communicate on a daily basis the specialness of your Teen. She is
not her grades. She is not her peer group. She is not her extracurricular
activities. She is a precious gift from God, who loves YOU with all her
heart, even as she is screaming at the top of her lungs in a hormone
induced frenzy.
4. Actively show concern for your Teen in all her activities, not just
the ones YOU enjoy most. Support him in all that he does that is legal,
ethical and moral. (And if he is doing things that do NOT fall in this
category, by all means STOP him! :-̃)
5. Be a Parent Your Teen and her friends want to be around. Open your
home to them. Have teen friendly treats available. State the groundrules
for visitors, and then expect them to follow them. Appreciate your Teens
friends as individuals deserving of respect, just as you would treat your
adult friends.
6. Participate in school activities. Bianca loved it when (believe it
or not) I brought cupcakes to school on her 15th birthday. Enough for the
entire band and drill team. Be aware of the school calendar. Rearrange
your schedule as possible for your Teen, it will reap you many rewards.
7. Once a week, take your Teen out alone for a cup of coffee, to see
what is happening with her. Talk out any problems, brainstorm solutions,
offer concern, have Celebrations! This may be the most special time of the
week for her...and YOU too!
